El Paso Politics

Ohhh San Eli… mi querido San Eli - the little pueblo that could… if only it would stop tripping over its own chanclas. Let’s get into it. So, San Elizario politics are bubbling again, and if you’ve been paying attention, this ain’t your first rodeo out there on Socorro Road. This town has novela-level drama that would have every abuelita in the Lower Valley glued to the TV waiting for the next episode.  Or if you're like my own mother, binging episodes on Netflix, yelling at the TV to "don't trust him, don't trust him!" And I'm not talking about your  garden variety novelas either, I'm talking about  the kind where you can’t tell who’s the villain, who’s the hero, and who just showed up for the free pan dulce. Let’s start with the last mayor, Isela Reyes - the self-proclaimed queen of San Eli. Her reign was, how do I put it… more sketch than a $3 bill at Chico’s Tacos. Her business got raided and sources say, shut down after not paying liquor vendors,...

Well, look at that. America just sent a little love letter to Donald Trump and his band of extremist Republicans tonight - and it was written in big blue ink. Democrats stacked up win after win in tonight’s elections, and you can practically hear the MAGA hats tightening across the country. You know things are bad for them when Fox News starts using words like “headwinds” and “unexpected outcomes.” Nah, homie, it ain’t unexpected - people are just tired of your pendejadas. Meanwhile, the government’s shut down (again), because Republicans would rather throw a tantrum than govern. They’re holding the economy hostage because feeding poor people and funding basic government operations apparently offends their delicate conservative sensibilities. Welcome to the GOP’s America — where billionaires get bailouts and kids get their lunch trays taken away. Where the GOP blames Democrats for keeping your costs low and lies about the funding bill with a straight face.  Trump keeps telling...

You ever have one of those moments where you’re like, “Damn, maybe we really  are  living in a sitcom”? That was the El Paso County Courthouse today — except nobody was laughing. Word on the marble floors is that a few judges nearly needed new robes after the Sheriff’s Office pulled another episode of   Keystone Cops: Border Edition. Here’s the gist: apparently, a   soldier   showed up to the courthouse with a   weapon . Yeah, you read that right —   armed and inside the courthouse.   And before you start clutching your pearls, yes, he turned out to be CID (Army Criminal Investigation Division) escorting a family. So the dude was legit. But the real story here isn’t him — it’s how our so-called   courthouse security   handled it. Or more accurately… how they   didn’t. So, Bailiff Supervisor gets a call from a Lt. who got the info from a Sgt., who supposedly cleared the guy, but didn’t tell the other deputies. Then Bailiff Supervisor...

Man, I really tried to stay quiet on this one. I was sittin’ there, chillin’, watching El Paso City Council like it was one of those bad novelas where you already know the plot twist - but you keep watching anyway, ‘cause you can’t believe these Foos are actually gonna do it.  And then they did it.  Just kidding, I was watching FitFam and saw the story there.  So here’s the setup: The Trump administration drops this dumbass little propaganda piece at our airport - basically blaming the shutdown chaos and flight delays on Democrats. Like, the same Democrats that actually tried to reopen the damn government. It was a classic MAGA move: gaslight the public, twist the truth, and slap it on a screen for every abuelita flying to Dallas to see. Now, you’d think El Paso, this brown, bilingual, border-loving city, would take one look at that nonsense and say, “Hell no, not in our house.” But nah, Foo - our brave City Council got stage fright. The vote to challenge the Trump ...