Fenenbock Stumbles Out of TX16 Starting Blocks

*Stunt Double, not actually Fenenbock

Kelly Ann Karlsruher has his work cut out for him...So lets see how big of a stinky pile this one ends up being....

Dori Fenenbock, candidate for Congress who inexplicably doesn't want to be called a candidate, recently launched her campaign website. And its chock full of fun, including some awesome low-key racist remarks!

And lets be honest, who doesn't love low-key racist humor against Latinos in El Paso by rich westside white folk, amirite?

I detailed her voting history in a previous post and it was basically exclusively Republican until the last primary in which she suddenly became a Democrat. Well as I read her website it looks like she's still having a hard time figuring out what our side of the aisle advocates on some issues - including my latest topic - comprehensive immigration reform.

There's a genuine lack of authenticity to the tone of the website. Its very saccharine and has a turn-key fill-in-the-blanks kind of feel to it. When you look at the substance of the policies she discusses, she absolutely sounds more like a Republican than a Democrat in her positions.

But there is something else that makes the website feel inauthentic and contrived...Take note of the yellow highlighted portion. It almost makes you miss the fact that she is talking about prosecuting people who hire the undocumented (I'm sure the small business community and the Chamber of Commerce are just going to LOVE that answer by the way), but it appears that she or someone else left in a parenthetical remark about whether or not it was wise to use that line.

No, seriously. I'm not joking.

Check it out:

I mean talk about someone's authentic views amirite? Don't we all want someone in congress representing us that will figure out where they stand on issues on the fly? Seriously, having a clearly defined set or values or policy positions is soooooo 2016, amirite?

Its the Trump era of make shit up as we go along!

Either she launched her website with her parenthetical notes by accident (revealing she is still trying to figure out exactly what she wants to say), or she really is that inauthentic of a candidate.

She should probably not take campaign advice from Kelly Ann Karlsruher who wants her to sound like a Republican and run as a Democrat.

But for us humble little Latino folk here in the 16th Congressional District of Texas, our favorite part has to be the section in green! Does she think Latinos are so dumb that they wouldn't figure out that you need a ladder that is higher than the wall to scale it?

The Maya were advanced in mathematics, I'm pretty raza can figure out you need a 13 foot ladder to scale a 12 foot wall Mrs. Fenenbock!

But hey, whats humor if its not low-key racist, que no?

This race promises to be lots of fun. I mean who in Washington PACs wouldn't take a Democratic candidate who sounds like a Republican, who has voted Republican more than Democratic, who's spouse is still a Republican, and has pics on her website that include profanity and some weird reference to the annihilation of Jews seriously?